Again, going on the theme that no one cares about what you’re doing more than you do. And that’s both the fear and the relief. No one cares. So it’s fine if you do what you do. But no one cares. So no one notices that you do what you do. It’s both a relief and one of our most desperate fears.


You are late
to traffic school and you wonder –
can you get a ticket for that?

So you have to sit in
the very first row
because no one wanted to sit there
and they’re all hoping that one
empty row of chairs
will help them blend into the crowd

You have heard that when
people are late to these things
that the lecturer heckles you
but when you plop
into the front row
he just continues to talk about

Well that’s odd
you think
and you think you’re relieved.

But you glance at your palms just to make sure
you’re not invisible.

Your eyes begin to glaze over
like the krispy kreme
donut you were eating
that got you here in the
first place.

It’s a long story.
But now you’ve learned it is never
good to
eat and drive.

The man talks about
red lights
as you rummage inside your
bag but you can only find
a cough drop so
you chew on it to try to keep
yourself entertained

When you swallow the wrong way,
a few things pass through your

Well at least now that I’m choking I’m not so bored.
I’m going to die
Has this ever happened to anyone else?

You try to contain it but that
only makes you cough more and splutter
and the cough drop launches out of your mouth and
skitters across the floor landing
in an awkward red saliva puddle
in the middle of the room and you’re coughing and choking and trying to swallow and that’s only making it worse and oh god everyone in the room must be staring at you like you are some kind of primordial moron who just crawled out of the ooze and you’re still coughing and the cute guy with the curly hair you noticed is probably wondering how you even obtained your driver’s license and that blonde lady with the boob job is definitely wondering how your mother allowed you out of the house and it is too humiliating you can’t even turn around because everyone is going to be staring at you –

but no
the curly haired guy is wondering
if he left the oven on
boob job lady is checking a text
and the instructor is still talking
about being mindful of
your surroundings.

2 thoughts on “Ticket

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